My CV

Finding Pleasure in Movement and Exercise

by Stacey Nye, Ph.D.

Exercise is like flossing your teeth.  It's one of those "shoulds"; one of those things we are supposed to do but find ourselves avoiding. We might make up excuses not to floss, like I don't have time, it's too messy, it hurts, or makes my gums bleed. We may feel guilty before visiting the dentist, and may even binge-floss a few days beforehand so we don't have to lie when the hygienist asks us if we floss. We may even be shamed by our spouses or peers who are regular flossers and who try to convince us of its virtues.

Exercise, like flossing, is a "should".  Some of us avoid it because we don't have time, don't like to sweat, aren't coordinated or don't enjoy physical exertion.  We may feel guilty or get shamed by peers who are exercise fanatics. We may even start costly exercise programs that we begin with fervor but eventually stop. We may focus on goals, like weight loss or calorie burning, that take too long, are too difficult to achieve, never last and ultimately make us feel bad about ourselves. We may have unrealistic expectations about the frequency, amount of time or ultimate heart-rate to attain. Whatever the reasons, for those people who are not naturally athletic or don't know about the joys of working out, exercise is avoided.

Let's examine some reasons for exercise resistance more closely:
1. Exercise is associated with dieting.  Most people start an exercise program when they start a new diet. Since dieting has a 95% failure rate, those people will likely quit their exercise program and develop a negative attitude towards exercise.
2. Exercise is intended to alter the shape of the body to meet cultural ideals.  People who don't achieve that ideal shape within a specified period of time may become discouraged and develop a negative attitude towards exercise.
3. Exercise is used as a measure of self worth.  In today's society, people who exercise and are physically fit are perceived as strong, committed and healthy. Since exercise alone is not able to increase self-worth, a negative attitude is developed towards exercise.
4. History of abuse. Moving the body can bring up body memories of physical or sexual abuse, triggering flashbacks or severe emotional reactions. In these cases, a negative attitude towards exercise can develop.
5. Exercise is used as punishment. When diet goals are not achieved, or a person overeats a formerly forbidden food, the body can be viewed as bad and self-indulgent and one may over-exercise in order to punish oneself. This can also set up negative attitudes towards exercise.

In order to increase your activity level, you must begin to think about exercise in a different way and therefore develop a positive attitude. Effective motivation needs to come from within, with the emphasis placed on how one feels in their body emotionally and spiritually. Changes in the external body shape need to be viewed as a side effect, and if viewed as the main goal will sabotage the mind/body connection

Here are some recommendations:
1. Explore your past relationship with exercise to determine what reasons have gotten in the way for you.
2. Develop some new goals for exercise.  Differentiate between exercise used to change the body and that used to simply move the body. Try to develop at least one activity with a goal of movement and joy.
3. Make a list of any and all physical activities that bring you joy, increased energy and/or mastery. They can be done in the course of the day, as part of life, without any assigned structure, such as dancing, walking the dog, shoveling snow, making love, etc.
4. Pay attention to the sensations in the body before, during and after the exercise.  Hot, sweaty, breathless- these are all natural results of physical
activity.  With time you will learn to tolerate if not come to enjoy these sensations.
5. Set appropriate, achievable goals.  Don't expect to increase your exercise too rapidly, or you will set yourself for failure. Maybe develop fitness- related incentives, such as new equipment, when you notice some mastery or commitment in an area.
6. Avoid talking about/focusing on fat, burning calories, or losing weight. Keep in mind the health benefits, instead. These benefits begin with as little as a 15 minute walk each day.
7. Remember that fatness does not preclude fitness. Thin people aren't always fit, nor are fat people necessarily unfit.

I began 2 years ago by riding the stationary bike while reading a novel. I looked forward to this because as a working mother of 2 small children, I have little time to read. I found I could sit on that bike for 30-45 minutes without hardly noticing it because I wanted to see what happened next in my book. I varied this with listening to homemade tapes of my favorite music. I found my speed and intensity would vary depending on what I was listening to, and if I was alone I would sing along and actually become Patti LaBelle or Tina Turner.  I also began swimming-something I always enjoyed but was never very good at. I swam 8 lengths my first time (it wiped me out) and gradually increased to 30 minutes. I considered taking lessons, but decided that was too much pressure and I might stop enjoying it  Sometimes I even  have wonderful, soothing dreams that I'm swimming and I then know it's time for me to get back in the water. More recently, when the weather started to warm, I took up walking around my neighborhood while listening to a recorded book. I have also picked up many landscaping ideas through this. I actually look for excuses to walk just so that I can continue listening to my book and keep track of how the neighbors' tulips are doing.

In addition, I tried to find ways to increase the overall level of activity in my life- something I had never been taught or had considered before.  I don't mean like taking the stairs instead of the elevator-YUK.  I mean I went swimming with my children instead of sitting on the bench and watching.  I went hiking through the woods with my husband instead of sitting at a movie.  I walked to a lunch date instead of driving.  I did fun things with fun people, for the pure enjoyment of it.

After 1 year of regular activity, I rewarded myself with membership to the upscale fitness and locker room at my health club. I now utilize state of the art equipment, use a private steam and whirlpool, and have my workout clothes laundered for me daily. I sip coffee, get a manicure, and apply my make up with my "active" peers. Like flossing, I have a new appreciation for my body and the virtues of regular activity. I have more energy, feel stronger and more flexible, and participate in more activities. I wake up every morning and plan when I will get my workout in, rather than what I can do besides work out each day. I now exercise for 20-40 minutes, 5-7 days a week. I do it because I like it, not because I feel that I have to. Don't get me wrong, I would still rather sleep an extra hour than get up and ride my bike (although that too is starting to shift), but I would rather splash in the pool with my kids than sit on the side and worry about my makeup.

Exercise should be done neither as a punishment for looking bad nor as a necessary evil for looking good. It's a gift that you can give yourself because you need and deserve it.